Last year on my birthday I made a wish when my candles blew out… I wished that if I were to join God in heaven this next year, that He would comfort and give strength to my family and closest friends.
The biggest burden on my heart wasn’t that I was in extreme pain, it wasn’t that I was losing control of my limbs, and it wasn’t about dying…. It was about my family, what would they do if I died this next year??
I had planned every letter I wanted to write and leave behind as my last words to my family members and best friends. I wanted them to know how I adored them. And I wanted them to let go of me and move forward with their lives until we met up again in our true home-heaven.
But I never wrote those letters… God had me keep pushing, and fighting, and persevering to get through every minute of each day… It is 1 year later and I made it!!! I made it to 23!!!
Not only did I make it, but I’m finally getting treatment that is supposed to help my Lyme disease. I’ve been here 2 weeks and the treatment pushed me to my limit of maximum pain I’ve had to deal with (and I’ve had to deal with alot ;)). The doctor said I’m the sickest patient they’ve worked with doing this IV program to treat Lyme disease. I was supposed to be here 3 weeks and now it will be 4 or 5 because of how sick I’ve become.
But they are working with me and they are an amazing staff of caring people. I know God led me here to this treatment and I know He’s the one leading me through it. Many of you who read my blog have donated your money to help me get this treatment… And for that I can never say thank you enough!!! God is using you to save and change my life. How do I even convey how grateful I am.. But I am. I lay here with eyes tearing up because I am so touched by all of you. By your love, your support, your prayers, and your sacrifice, you have touched my life forever. Thank you!!
22 years old I thought I might be near the end. 23 years and I think I may be at the beginning :). I’m so glad to still be here on earth, to be alive, to be getting a glimpse of hope that I’ll dance again… But what I’ve learned this past year is whether you are at the beginning here on earth, or at the beginning in heaven, it is a beautiful thing, an amazing opportunity, a gift from God.
So for those of you here on earth I hope I can encourage you to embrace your life. And for those of you who may be approaching heaven, I hope I can give you hope that this is not the end, you’re about to approach a beautiful beginning there.
Philippians 1:21 For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.